Ephesians 6

Let's read through a different version of Chapter 6 before digging into its details!

(1) CHILDREN, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do.

• Colossians 3:20: Children, always obey your parents, for this pleases the Lord.

(2) Honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment with a promise

• Exodus 20:12: Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

(3) If you honor your father and mother, things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.

(4) FATHERS, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.

• Colossians 3:21: Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged.
• Proverbs 22:6: Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.
• In the ancient world fathers had absolute control and were sometimes harsh, even cruel. Nothing crushes a child's spirit more than a cruel word from his or her father.
  
• The Bible teaches that it is primarily the father's responsibility to train up and teach the children - not the mother's! One of the great problems with families today is that the fathers have abandoned their responsibility! Specifically, it is the father's job, not the mother's, to teach the Word of God to the children, to teach them moral values, to help them to honor not only their father but also their mother (children often imitate their father's attitude toward their mother), how to get along with others, how to succeed in life, how to treat others, how to help others - to ensure their growing up into responsible, well-educated, godly men and women. The child's first concept of who God is is their view of their father - is he loving, kind, self-sacrificing or is he a tyrannical bully primarily interested in himself? Fathers sometimes fail to praise their children resulting in adults, especially men, who strive so hard to please a father who can't be pleased, to win approval that never comes.
• Sons learn from their father how to live - not by the father's words but by the father's actions. If the father has a problem with self-control, so will the son. If the father has an anger issue, so will the son. If the father disrespects women, especially the son's mother, so will the son. Men tend to think that screaming and yelling will get their way, but all it really does is reveal their weakness and lack of self-control which will eventually lead the son or daughter to be glad for the day they've been able to grow up and get away from their father. A man can be successful in the eyes of the world in business, finance, status, education, etc., but if he is a failure as a father, he is a failure at what really matters in life.
• The Christian father is really an instrument in God's hand.
• Quotations on parenting:
  
  
  • "Love your children with all your hearts, love them enough to discipline them before it is too late. Praise them for important things, even if you have to stretch them a bit. Praise them a lot. They live on it like bread and butter, and they need it more than bread and butter." (Lavina Christensen Fugal-America's Mother of the Year in 1955)
  • "You will find that if you really try to be a father, your child will meet you halfway." ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
  • "Don't worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you." ~Robert Fulghum
  • "It behooves a father to be blameless if he expects his child to be." ~Homer
  • "Children have more need of models than of critics." ~Carolyn Coats, Things Your Dad Always Told You But You Didn't Want to Hear
  • "Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children." ~Charles R. Swindoll, The Strong Family
  • "You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's. He is more particular.... The father is always a Republican towards his son, and his mother's always a Democrat." ~Robert Frost
  • "Most American children suffer too much mother and too little father." ~Gloria Steinem, New York Times, 26 August 1971
  • "Treat your children's mother with respect. Your relationship with your wife is where children first learn about relationships between men and women. When your son sees how you treat your wife with respect, it sets the tone in how he will treat women in the future. Your daughters it will set the standard for future relationships with men and will settle for nothing less than respect in a relationship. ... The most important thing is to love your children. Make sure you tell your children you love them and show them through your godly character." ~Allen Bell, How to Be a Christian Father.

(5) SLAVES, obey your earthly masters with deep respect and fear. Serve them sincerely as you would serve Christ.

• Colossians 3:22-25: Slaves, obey your earthly masters in everything you do. Try to please them all the time, not just when they are watching you. Serve them sincerely because of your reverent fear of the Lord. Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ. But if you do what is wrong, you will be paid back for the wrong you have done. For God has no favorites.
• For the most part, these were Christian slaves owned by pagan masters - their goal should be the salvation of their masters.

(6) Try to please them all the time, not just when they are watching you. As slaves of Christ, do the will of God with all your heart.

(7) Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.

(8) Remember that the Lord will reward each one of us for the good we do, whether we are slaves or free.

• Colossians 3:17,23-24: And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father. ... Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ.

(9) MASTERS, treat your slaves in the same way. Don't threaten them; remember, you both have the same Master in heaven, and he has *no
favorites.

• *no favorites: One's lot in this life, whether high or low, is merely a preparation for eternity.
• Employers and bosses may not think of this, but they ought to serve their workers and underlings, not as being subject to them, but as concerned about their proper welfare and treating them kindly and fairly Threatening, simply as a tool to instill fear, would be an abuse of authority - both at home and at work. Consider the character of Boaz in Ruth 2:4. His relationship with his servants was excellent, for he first recognized his Master in heaven. Remember that if we have people "under us" whether in the chain of command or simply station in life or education, we need to remember that we work for someone higher than us who's watching and evaluating our work here on earth and we too shall receive His "performance review".
• It is so easy for us to demean people we consider to be “low on the totem pole.” We do not have slaves, but we do have “service personnel” and people who “do not count.” It is easy to dehumanize and tyrannize them. We “chew them out” when we are unsatisfied. We view them as faceless numbers when the time comes to downsize. By lack of attention, body language, or attitude we communicate to them, “We do not really care about you.” Yet such people are as important as any “star” or power-broker, and our Christian witness depends on how we treat them. We must relate to them as if we were relating to Christ.
  
• Job 31:13-15: “If I have been unfair to my male or female servants when they brought their complaints to me, how could I face God? What could I say when he questioned me? For God created both me and my servants. He created us both in the womb.
• Colossians 4:1: Masters, be just and fair to your slaves. Remember that you also have a Master in heaven.

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(10) A final word: *BE STRONG in the Lord and in his mighty **power.

• Ephesians 6:10 (Amplified Bible): In conclusion, be strong in the Lord [be empowered through your union with Him]; draw your strength from Him [that strength which His boundless might provides].
• The basis of Ephesians 6:10 is Romans 8:37-39: No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow not even the powers of hell can separate us from God's love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.
• *strong: Greek endunamoo = Be energized or empowered. Our true strength to stand is in the Lord and not in ourselves. This is resurrection strength.
  
  • 2 Timothy 2:1: Timothy, my dear son, be strong through the grace that God gives you in Christ Jesus.
• **power: Greek kratos = Power put forth with effect, might. This is resurrection power:
  
  • Ephesians 1:19-20: I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God's power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power that raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God's right hand in the heavenly realms.

(11) *PUT ON all of God's **armor so that you will be able to ***STAND firm against all strategies of the ****devil.

• *Put on:
  
  • Ephesians 4:24: Put on your new nature, created to be like God - truly righteous and holy.
  • Romans 13:12-14: The night is almost gone; the day of salvation will soon be here. So remove your dark deeds like dirty clothes, and put on the shining armor of right living. Because we belong to the day, we must live decent lives for all to see. Don't participate in the darkness of wild parties and drunkenness, or in sexual promiscuity and immoral living, or in quarreling and jealousy. Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. And don't let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires.
• **armor:
  
  • 1 Thessalonians 5:8: But let us who live in the light be clearheaded, protected by the armor of faith and love, and wearing as our helmet the confidence of our salvation.
• ***Stand: Notice that all but one in the list is defensive, not offensive! Only the sword - the Word of God - can be used offensively.
• ****devil:
  
  • 2 Corinthians 4:4: Satan, who is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of those who don't believe. They are unable to see the glorious light of the Good News. They don't understand this message about the glory of Christ, who is the exact likeness of God.
  • 1 Peter 5:8-9: Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your Christian brothers and sisters all over the world are going through the same kind of suffering you are.
  • Revelation 12:9: This great dragon the ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, the one deceiving the whole world was thrown down to the earth with all his angels.
    

(12) For we are not *fighting against flesh and blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.

• *fighting:
  
  • Greek pallo refers to a wearing, grinding endurance such as wrestling rather than the brilliant charge.
  • 2 Timothy 4:7-8: I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful. And now the prize awaits me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing
• Colossians 2:14-15: He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross. In this way, he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross.
• 2 Corinthians 10:4: We use God's mighty weapons, not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments.

(13) Therefore, PUT ON every piece of God's armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm.

(14) STAND your ground, putting on the *belt of truth and the **body armor of God's ***righteousness.

• *belt of truth:
• John 14:6: Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.
• Our primary defense is knowing the truth of God. The belt (girdle in the KJV) held the armor together. Likewise, the truth holds our defense together.
• **body armor:
  
  • =breastplate.
  • A soldier's breastplate covered his body from the neck to the waist in the front and back. We are covered in the righteousness of Christ. Satan has no grounds on which to accuse us, because our forgiveness provides us with the righteousness of Christ.
• ***righteousness:
  
  • His righteousness, not mine!
  • Philippians 3:9: and become one with him. I no longer count on my own righteousness through obeying the law; rather, I become righteous through faith in Christ. For God's way of making us right with himself depends on faith.

(15) For *shoes, PUT ON the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.

• *shoes: A Roman soldier wasn't prepared to fight without his sandals on. His sandals had spikes in the soles to give him better footing, much like our sports players today wear cleats. They allow quick movement without slipping. We should be prepared to share the gospel of peace wherever we go, in a sure-footed way. Warfare of that day was hand-to-hand combat, so a sure footing was critical.

(16) In addition to all of these, HOLD UP the *shield of faith to stop the
fiery arrows of the devil.

• *shield of faith:
• This isn't referring to saving faith, but to the faith of daily living. We must trust in the power of God and that He will keep His promises. The soldier's shield must be held in place to be effective. Likewise, we must hold our faith, never putting it down. With our shield, we will stop Satan's fiery missiles from harming us. (That doesn't mean he'll quit throwing them.) Satan's missiles (darts) are such things as lies, evil thoughts, hateful thoughts, doubts, desire for sin, blasphemous thoughts. If we allow those to take hold in our minds and hearts, they will become flames of sin.
• "Before battles in which flaming arrows might be fired, the leather would be wetted to quench any fiery darts launched against them. After Roman legionaries closed ranks, the front row holding shields forward and those behind them holding shields above them, they were virtually invulnerable to any attack from flaming arrows." (IVP Background Commentary)

(17) PUT ON salvation as your *helmet, and TAKE the **sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

• *helmet: "The helmet of salvation" is protection for the mind
• Isaiah 59:17: He put on righteousness as his body armor and placed the helmet of salvation on his head. He clothed himself with a robe of vengeance
• 1 Thessalonians 5:8: But let us who live in
  the light be clearheaded, protected by the armor of faith and love, and
  wearing as our helmet the confidence of our salvation.
• The helmet protects the head. We must protect our minds and never let Satan have control over them. Satan played with Eve's mind (Genesis 3), and that resulted in Adam and Eve's sin. It is imperative that we study God's word and always be learning the truth.
• Unfortunately it is easy to fall into complacency and ignore our helmets allowing the pollution of the world attack our minds from sources such as television, magazines, the internet, or the confusion of daily life. We must always be on guard to protect our minds or we will open ourselves up to head wounds that will nominalize our walk with God. In this the enemy's spiritual strongholds are basically patterns of thought that conflict with the Lord and His ways.
• **sword:
  
  • Isaiah 49:2: He made my words of judgment as sharp as a sword. He has hidden me in the shadow of his hand. I am like a sharp arrow in his quiver.
  • 2 Corinthians 6:7: We faithfully preach the truth. God's power is working in us. We use the weapons of righteousness in the right hand for attack and the left hand for defense.
  • Hebrews 4:12: For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires.
  • "The sword of the Spirit" is the one offensive weapon mentioned here. To use it, we must first have it. It is the Word of God that cuts both ways, so to use it rightly on the enemy, we must know how to rightly use it on ourselves. How important then that we spend time in learning God's Word well, so that on any given occasion we may be prepared with the suitable scripture to meet the enemy in whatever way he attacks.
  • The Roman soldier had a short sword for hand-to-hand combat. God's Word is like that sword because it is sharp and is able to pierce a man. The physical sword pierces the physical man, while the word of God pierces his heart. When we allow God to use His word in our lives, He can affect real change in our hearts through it. God's word was what Jesus used to combat Satan's temptations, and we should do likewise.
  • When the devil attacked Jesus, Jesus defended himself with weapons available to us: The Word of God. "Christ's answers came not from scattered locations in God's Word, but from Deuteronomy 6-8. And what is Deuteronomy 6-8? It is Moses' reminder to Israel's second generation about the sins of the first generation in the wilderness. They are to learn from these failures to live by obedience to the word of God without complaining or testing God or yielding to false worship. Jesus, Matthew is telling us, achieved what Israel regularly failed to achieve because of disobedience. As Yahweh's Son and Servant he will not only bring Israel's restoration but also a light to the Gentiles" (Baylis, From Creation to the Cross, 1996, p. 116).
• "One of every 400,000 babies is born each year with Severe Combined Immunodeficiency Disease, or SCID, a disease that leaves the child with no body-chemistry defenses to fight infection from the germs that constantly attack one’s body. For such children, life is often short and always filled with danger. In a similar manner, the Christian who is not protected by the armor of God is defenseless against the attacks of the flesh, the world, and Satan. Sin, like an infection, can eat its way into his life because he has no defense against it." (Illustrations for Biblical Preaching)
  
• Martyn Lloyd-Jones observes that there are three dangers when it comes to spiritual warfare:
  
  1. Thinking that there is no warfare,
  2. Avoiding the warfare and
  3. Fighting with the wrong weapons.

(18) PRAY in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.

• Mark 14:38: Keep watch and pray, so that you will not give in to temptation. For the spirit is willing, but the body is weak.
• Philippians 4:6: Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.
• Colossians 4:2: Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart.
• 1 Thessalonians 5:17: Never stop praying.
• The six-fold armor is rendered effective by prayer.

(19) And pray for me, too. Ask God to give me the right words so I can boldly explain God's mysterious plan that the Good News is for Jews and Gentiles alike.

• Ephesians 3:4-6: As you read what I have written, you will understand my insight into this plan regarding Christ. God did not reveal it to previous generations, but now by his Spirit he has revealed it to his holy apostles and prophets. And this is God's plan: Both Gentiles and Jews who believe the Good News share equally in the riches inherited by God's children. Both are part of the same body, and both enjoy the promise of blessings because they belong to Christ Jesus.

(20) I am in chains now, still preaching this message as God's *ambassador. So pray that I will keep on speaking boldly for him, as I should.

• *ambassador: 2 Corinthians 5:20: So we are Christ's ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, Come back to God!

(21) To bring you up to date, *Tychicus will give you a full report about what I am doing and how I am getting along. He is a beloved brother and faithful helper in the Lord's work.

• *Tychicus:
  
  • Tychicus is assigned to deliver this letter and the letter to the Colossians.
  • Acts 20:4: Several men were traveling with him. They were Sopater son of Pyrrhus from Berea; Aristarchus and Secundus from Thessalonica; Gaius from Derbe; Timothy; and Tychicus and Trophimus from the province of Asia.
    
  • Colossians 4:7: Tychicus will give you a full report about how I am getting along. He is a beloved brother and faithful helper who serves with me in the Lord's work.
  • Titus 3:12: I am planning to send either Artemas or Tychicus to you. As soon as one of them arrives, do your best to meet me at Nicopolis, for I have decided to stay there for the winter.
  • 2 Timothy 4:12: I sent Tychicus to Ephesus
  
  

(22) I have sent him to you for this very purpose to let you know how we are doing and to encourage you.

23) Peace be with you, dear brothers and sisters, and may God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ give you love with faithfulness.

(24) May God's grace be eternally upon all who love our Lord Jesus Christ.

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NOTE: Sources and References are on line at: http://ephesians-blog.blogspot.com/2010/07/ephesians-study-references.html

Ephesians 5

(1) *Imitate God, **THEREFORE, in everything
you do, because
you are his dear children.

• *Imitate: Greek - mimetes, from which
  we get our word "mimic". mimetes occurs 7 times in the New
  Testament.
  How can anyone do that?
  
  • John 13:34: So now I am giving you a
    new commandment: Love each other. Just as I
    have loved you, you should love each other.
  • 1 Corinthians 4:16: So I urge you to imitate
    me.
  • 1 Corinthians 11:1: And you should imitate
    me, just as I imitate Christ.
  • 1 Thessalonians 1:6: So you received
    the message with joy from the Holy Spirit in spite of the severe
    suffering it brought you. In this way, you imitated
    both us and the Lord.
  • 1 Thessalonians 2:14: And then, dear
    brothers and sisters, you suffered persecution from your own
    countrymen. In this way, you imitated the believers
    in God’s churches in Judea who, because of their belief in Christ
    Jesus, suffered from their own people, the Jews.
  • Hebrews 6:12: Then you will not become
    spiritually dull and indifferent. Instead, you will follow the
    example of those who are going to inherit God’s promises
    because of their faith and endurance.
  • 1 Peter 2:21: For God called you to do
    good, even if it means suffering, just as Christ suffered for you. He
    is your example, and you must follow in his steps.
  • So, how can we imitate God?
  • In many important respects, it is utterly impossible for us
    to imitate God. We cannot copy
    God, for example, in either his creative or his redemptive work. But,
    in
    the areas of attitude and relationships, we can follow our
    Maker. Especially we are to become more like our heavenly Father in
    love and forgiveness.
• **therefore: Back to 4:1: Therefore
  I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life
  worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God.
  
  • Paul is going to continue illustrating how to lead a life
    worthy of our calling. Do you remember the examples in chapter 4?

(2) *Live a life filled with **love, following the
example
of Christ. He loved us and ***offered himself as a
sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God.

• This is the key verse for chapter 5.
• *Live a life filled with love - "Walk in
  love".
  
  • 3-Fold walk (much clearer in the KJV):
    
    • 5:2-7: Walk in love.
    • 5:8-14: Walk in light.
    • 5:15-16: Walk circumspectly (wisely).
  **love:
  
  • Ephesians 3:17: Then Christ will make
    his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow
    down into God’s love and keep you strong.
  • Ephesians 4:2: Always be humble and
    gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s
    faults because of your love.
  • Ephesians 4:15: Instead, we will speak
    the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like
    Christ, who is the head of his body, the church.
  • John 13:34: So now I am giving you a
    new commandment: Love each other. Just as I
    have loved you, you should love each other.
  • 1 Corinthians 13:4-7:
    
    • Love is patient and kind. -
      ARE YOU?
    • Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or
      rude. - ARE YOU?
    • It does not demand its own way. -
      DO YOU?
    • It is not irritable, - DO YOU?
    • and it keeps no record of being wronged.
      - DO YOU?
    • It does not rejoice about injustice
      but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. - DO YOU?
    • Love never gives up,
    • never loses faith,
    • is always hopeful, and
    • endures through every circumstance.
      - IS THAT HOW YOU LOVE?
  • 1 Corinthians 16:14: And do
    everything with love.
  • Colossians 3:14: Above all, clothe
    yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect
    harmony.
  • 1 Peter 4:8: Most important of all,
    continue to show deep love for each other, for love
    covers a multitude of sins.
  • 1 John 3:23: And this is his
    commandment: We must believe in the name of
    his Son, Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as
    he commanded us.
• ***offered himself as a
  sacrifice for us:
  
  • Ephesians 5:25: For husbands, this
    means love your
    wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life
    for her
  • John 15:12-13: This is my commandment:
    Love each other in the same way I have loved you. There is no
    greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
  • Titus 2:14: He gave his life
    to free us from every kind of sin, to cleanse us, and to make us his
    very own people, totally committed to doing good deeds.
  • Hebrews 9:14: Just think how much more
    the blood of Christ will purify our consciences from sinful deeds so
    that we can worship the living God. For by the power of the eternal
    Spirit, Christ offered himself to God as a perfect sacrifice
    for our sins.
  • 1 Peter 2:4: He personally carried our
    sins in his body on the cross
    so that we can be dead to sin and live for what is right. By
    his wounds you are healed.
  • 1 John 3:16: We know what real
    love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So
    we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters.

(3) BUT let there be no *sexual
immorality, impurity, or **greed among you. Such sins have no
place among God’s people.

• *sexual
  immorality - Greek porneia.
  
  • Covers all sexual sins,
    including adultery, fornication, homosexuality, etc. These were not
    considered by the Gentiles in that time and area.
  • Galatians 5:19: When you follow
    the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear:
    sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures,
  • 1 Corinthians 6:13,18-20: You say,
    “Food was made for the stomach, and the stomach for food.” (This is
    true, though someday God will do away with both of them.) But you
    can’t say that our bodies were made for sexual immorality. They were
    made for the Lord, and the Lord cares about our bodies. ... Run
    from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as
    this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own
    body. Don’t you realize that your body is the temple
    of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by
    God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high
    price. So you must honor God with your body.
  • Jude 1:7: And don’t forget Sodom and
    Gomorrah and their neighboring towns, which were filled with immorality
    and every kind of sexual perversion. Those cities
    were destroyed by fire and serve as a warning of the eternal fire of
    God’s judgment.
• **greed - Greek pleonexia:
  A greedy or covetous man makes a god of his money.
  
  • Luke 12:15: Then he said, “Beware!
    Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how
    much you own.”

(4) *Obscene stories, foolish talk, and **coarse jokes—these
are not for you. Instead, let there be thankfulness
to God.

• *Obscene stories: It's pretty easy to know what
  this and "coarse
  jokes" mean, but what about "foolish talk"?
• **coarse jokes: "jesting" in the KJV.
  
  • Matthew 12:36: And I tell you this, you
    must give an account on judgment day for every idle word you
    speak.
  • Colossians 4:6: Let your conversation
    be gracious and attractive so that you will have the
    right response for everyone.

(5) You can be sure that no *immoral, impure, or
greedy person will **inherit the Kingdom of Christ and of God.
For a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the
things of this world.

• *immoral: fornicator.
• **inherit: Loss of reward! Remember the prodigal
  son? Remember 1 Corinthians 3:12-15?
  
  • 1 Corinthians 3:12-15: Anyone who
    builds on that foundation may use a variety of materials—gold, silver,
    jewels, wood, hay, or straw. But on the judgment day, fire will reveal what
    kind of work each builder has done. The fire will show if a
    person’s work has any value. If the work survives,
    that builder will receive a reward. But if the work
    is burned up, the builder will suffer great loss. The
    builder will be saved, but like someone barely
    escaping through a wall of flames.
  • Colossians 3:24: Remember that the Lord
    will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the
    Master you are serving is Christ.
• Colossians 3:5: So put to death the sinful,
  earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with
  sexual
  immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires. Don’t be greedy,
  for a
  greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world.

(6) Don’t be fooled by those who try to excuse these sins, for the
anger of God will fall on all who disobey him.

(7) Don’t participate in the things these
people do.

• This is hard enough today, but imagine how hard it must have been
  for these believers living in the midst of sin - like Lot.

(8) For once you were full of darkness, but
now you have *light from the Lord. So live as people
of light!

• *light: light in verses 8, 9, 13,14.

(9) For this light within you produces only
what is good and right and true.

• Galatians 5:22-23: But the Holy Spirit
  produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy,
  peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and
  self-control. There is no law against these things!

(10) Carefully determine what pleases the Lord.

• Not what pleases ourselves, but what pleases him. How do we find
  this out? By consulting God’s word, Isaiah 8:20 (Look
  to God’s instructions and teachings! People who contradict his word are
  completely in the dark).

(11) Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness;
instead, expose them.

• 2 Corinthians 6:14: Don’t team up with
  those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with
  wickedness? How can light live with darkness?

(12) It is shameful even to talk about the things that ungodly
people do in secret.

(13) But their evil intentions will be exposed when the light
shines on them,

(14) for the light makes everything visible.
This is why it is said, “Awake, O sleeper, rise up from the dead, and
Christ will give you light.”

• John 3:19-21: And the judgment is based on
  this fact: God’s light came into the world, but
  people loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were
  evil. All who do evil hate the light and refuse to go
  near it for fear their sins will be exposed. But those who do
  what is right come to the light so others can see that they
  are doing what God wants.”
• 1 John 1:5-7: This is the message we heard
  from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is
  no darkness in him at all. So we are lying if we say we have
  fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not
  practicing the truth. But if we are living in the light, as
  God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other,
  and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin.

(15) So be careful how you live. Don’t
live like fools, but like those who are wise.

(16) Make the most of every opportunity in
these evil days.

(17) Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand
what the Lord wants you to do.

• Proverbs 3:5: Trust in the Lord
  with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
• Luke 22:42: “Father, if you are
  willing, please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I
  want your will to be done, not mine.”

(18) Don’t be *drunk with wine, because that
will ruin your life. Instead, **be filled with the Holy Spirit,

• *drunk:
  
  • Proverbs 23:31: Don’t gaze at the wine,
    seeing how red it is, how it sparkles in the cup, how smoothly it goes
    down.
  • Isaiah 5:11: What sorrow for those who
    get up early in the morning looking for a drink of alcohol and spend
    long evenings drinking wine to make themselves flaming drunk.
  • Bacchus is the Roman god of wine. When people engaged in
    these unbelievable drunken brawls, they were called Bacchanalian
    feasts. They engaged in orgies of sexual perversion. The
    key element in pagan worship was drunkenness.
  • What do an alcohol-filled life and a Holy Spirit-filled life
    have in common? In both cases, a man becomes “a different person.” How
    many women stay married to a wife-beater because they say he's really
    nice when he's sober!
• **be filled:
  
  • This is in the present progressive imperative tense = be
    constantly filled with the Holy Spirit.
  • Colossians 3:16: Let the message about
    Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives...
  • Men are said to be filled with wine when completely under its
    influence. In the same way, they are said to be filled with the Spirit
    when He controls their thoughts, feelings, words and actions.
  • Dwight L. Moody once demonstrated the principle like this:
    “Tell me,” he said to his audience, “how can I get the air out of the
    tumbler I have in my hand?” One man said, “Suck it out with a pump.”
    But the evangelist replied, “That would create a vacuum and shatter
    it.” Finally after many suggestions, Moody picked up a pitcher and
    quietly filled the glass with water. “There,” he said, “all the air is
    now removed.” He then explained that victory for the child of God does
    not come by working hard to eliminate sinful habits, but rather by
    allowing the Holy Spirit to take full possession.
• This is the key that unlocks all the rest. From that great
  principle flows the instruction to the wife in verse 22, the
  instruction to the husband in verse 25, the instruction to the children
  in 6:1 and the instruction to the parents in 6:2. All of that marriage
  and family teaching flows out of this principle. In fact, it is the
  first of several necessary prerequisites for any
  successful marriage or any successful relationship.

(19) singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among
yourselves, and making music to the Lord in your hearts.

(20) And give thanks for everything to God
the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

• 1 Thessalonians 5:18: Be thankful
  in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who
  belong to Christ Jesus.
• Philippians 4:6: Don’t worry about
  anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank
  him for all he has done.
• Colossians 3:17: And whatever you do or
  say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving
  thanks through him to God the Father.

(21) And further, submit to one another out
of reverence for Christ.

• Notice that before Paul talks about wives submitting to their
  husbands, he says we are to SUBMIT TO EACH OTHER!
• Submission will not be a problem in homes where the husband and
  wife both have submitted themselves and their relationship to Christ,
  are walking with Him and have placed their marriage and love for each
  other above all else but under Christ.
• Since we are commanded to submit ourselves one
  to another, we are to place all others above ourselves.

(22) For wives, this means *submit
to
your husbands as to the Lord.

• *submit: hupotasso is a military term
  meaning "to put under" or "to arrange under".
• 1 Corinthians 11:3: But there is one thing
  I want you to know: The head of every man is Christ,
  the head of woman is man, and the head of
  Christ is God.
• Colossians 3:18: Wives, submit to your
  husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord.
• Proverbs 21:9: It’s better to live alone in
  the corner of an attic than with a quarrelsome wife in
  a lovely home.
• Christianity brought with it significant change for women, and
  apparently their freedom was a source of offense to non-Christians. In
  Galatians 3:28, for example, Paul wrote that distinctions like male and
  female no longer determined value. In 1 Corinthians 7:15, he counseled
  Christians that they did not have to stay with an unbelieving spouse
  who wanted to leave. That he would have granted wives such privilege
  would have been surprising to non-Christians, for the assumption of the
  day was that a wife would take the gods of her husband. It is
  understandable, therefore, that in Titus 2:5, Paul instructed women “to
  be subject to their husbands so that no one will malign the word of
  God.”
• The sinful tendency of fallen men is to dominate their wives by
  brute force. Even some Christian men are guilty of being too
  heavy-handed with authority. They practically lord it over their wives,
  as if marriage were designed to be a master-slave relationship. Some
  have even tried to claim that Ephesians 5:24 supports such a notion,
  because it urges wives to be subject to their husbands “in everything.”
  But that perspective of the husband’s role is antithetical to the
  pattern of headship Christ gives us. Anyone who thinks that way simply
  needs to read further into Ephesians 5. When Paul turned his attention
  to husbands he didn’t say, “Husbands, rule your wives; order them
  around; command them; exercise authority over them; dominate them”—or
  anything of the sort. He told them to love their wives as Christ loves
  the church: sacrificially, tenderly, meekly, and with a servant’s
  heart. This is how husbands are to show submission to their wives.
• Neither husband nor wife submitting = selfishness.
  
  One spouse submitting while the other doesn't = abuse.
  
  Mutual submission = the kind of marriage God wants for us.

(23) For a husband is the head of his wife as
Christ is the *head of the church. He is the Savior of
his body, the church.

• Colossians 1:18: Christ is also the head of the
  church, which is his body. He is the beginning,
  supreme over all who rise from the dead. So he is first in everything.
• Ephesians 5:23 does not focus on authority, but on the
  self-giving love of both Christ and the husband. Just as Jesus
  redefined greatness as being a servant (Matthew 20:26 – 27), Paul
  redefines being head as having responsibility to love, to give oneself
  and to nurture. A priority is placed on the husband, but, contrary to
  ancient society, it is for the benefit of the wife. The activity of
  both wife and husband is based in their relation to Christ and in his
  giving himself for the church.
• The joy of Christ will be to present to himself the Church,
  cleansed, holy and without blemish. That will be our moment of greatest
  joy as the Bride of Christ. Likewise, the joy of the husband is found
  in the joy of this wife. Husbands, you will never find joy and
  fulfillment in your marriage until your greatest joy is the joy and
  fulfillment of your wife.

(24) As the church submits to Christ, so you wives
should submit to your husbands in everything.

• So, HOW does the church (the body of Christ - you and me) submit
  to Christ? In blind, unloving, fearing obedience? Or, in response to
  His sacrificial love?

(25) For husbands, this means *love
your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave
up his life for her

• *love: This is agape
  love. This is a self-sacrificial love.
• 1 Peter 3:7: In the same way, you husbands
  must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding
  as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she
  is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as
  you should so your prayers will not be hindered.
• Colossians 3:19: Husbands, love your wives
  and never treat them harshly.
• When love is not the context of the
  husband/wife relationship, a petty tyranny begins to take shape. And so
  this is the
  headship of love, it is the leadership of love, it is the guiding of
  affection.
• Husbands are not only to love their wives, they are to give up
  their lives for them - what does that mean?
• This links back up with verse 2: Live a life filled
  with love, following the example
  of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a
  sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God.
• It is said that Cyrus, the founder of the Persian empire, once
  had captured a prince and his family. When they came before him, the
  monarch asked the prisoner, “What will you give me if I release you?”
  “The half of my wealth,” was the prince’s reply. “And if I release your
  children?” the monarch asked. “Everything I possess.” “And if I release
  your wife?” The prince replied, “Your majesty, I would give myself.”
  Cyrus was so moved by this man’s devotion, that he freed them all. As
  they returned home, the prince said to this wife, “Wasn’t Cyrus a
  handsome man?” With a look of deep love and respect for her husband,
  she said to him, “I didn’t even notice. I could only keep my eyes on
  the one who was willing to give himself for me.”
• This love is sacrificial, supernatural. It is not about getting,
  but about giving. The headship of the man speaks of care, not control;
  of responsibility, not rule. In this spirit, the husband lovingly leads
  his wife according to Luke 22:26 – "the leader should be like a
  servant"
• Paul tells us here in Ephesians, five ways to imitate God in your
  love toward your wife.

(26) to make her holy and clean, washed by
the cleansing of God’s word.

• Titus 3:5: he saved us, not because of the
  righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He
  washed away our sins, giving us a new birth and new life
  through the Holy Spirit.
• Ezekiel 36:25-27: “Then I will
  sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean. Your filth will be
  washed away, and you will no longer worship idols.

(27) He did this to present her to himself as a glorious
church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish.
Instead, she will be holy and without fault.

(28) In the same way, husbands ought to love their
wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his
wife actually shows love for himself.

• The command is not for the husbands to merely show affection, but
  to LOVE their wives and cherish
  her more than his own life and welfare.
• Men are the heads of the household and are therefore, ultimately
  responsible for the direction that the marriage takes. It is not as if
  women do not contribute to that direction. But if the marriage goes in
  a bad direction, the husband is ultimately responsible. One reason why
  a lot of women want to get out of their
  relationship is that the husband has not truly loved his wife as he
  loves himself. Instead, he loves himself more than his wife.
• This elevation and commitment to a wife was frankly revolutionary
  in the Roman world, as it is revolutionary in our world today. Kato, a
  Roman writer, said, "If you are to catch your wife in an act of
  infidelity, kill her without a trial. But if she catches you, she would
  not venture to touch you with her finger, she has no right."
• Unless God is shaping our lives and thoughts, there is no way we
  will be able to consistently love our wives.
• The husband is to love his wife with God’s love. God’s love has
  several characteristics. If our love falls short of these qualities,
  then we should no longer call what we do love. The apostle Paul uses
  the Greek word ‘agape’ to describes this love in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
  and elsewhere in the New Testament:
  
  • Love is patient and kind.
    Love is not jealous or boastful or proud
    or rude. It does not demand its own way.
    It is not irritable, and it keeps no record
    of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices
    whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up,
    never loses faith, is always hopeful,
    and endures through every circumstance.
• How should a man love his wife?
  
  • He should be willing to sacrifice everything for her.
  • He should make her well-being of primary importance and
  • He should care for her as he cares for his own body.
    
    • No wife needs to fear submitting to a man who treats her
      in this way.

(29) No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for
it, just as Christ cares for the church.

(30) And we are members of his body.

(31) As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother
and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”

• Genesis 2:24: This explains why a man leaves
  his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two
  are united into one.
• "Oneness" requires the husband and wife to blend together as one
  under God’s rulership. If the husband and wife remain as two so that
  they retain their individualism and independence, then they will
  destroy their marriage and lives. Many Christian marriages are not
  Christian at all because they do not live as one but two.

(32) This is a great mystery, but it is an
illustration of the way Christ and the church are one.

(33) So again I say, each man must love his wife as he
loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

• Mrs. T. Grace Atkinson of The National Organization of Women
  says, "Marriage is legalized servitude and family relations are the
  basis for all human oppression."
• There is no question about the fact that the family is under a
  major assault, that people want to redefine family in absolutely any
  terms they want.
• Every year millions of hopeful couples pledge themselves in
  marriage and half of
  them end in a fight that splits the marriage. And when those who have
  that
  one split go on to marry again, two thirds of them will split, because
  they never really understood what caused the original problem and have
  not really changed.
• If you have a Spirit-filled, obedient, praising,
  worshiping, thankful, submissive heart, you've got the stuff that's
  going to make a wonderful family, a wonderful marriage and a wonderful
  life. Anything else is a battle for your own way, it's that simple.
  Only the power of the Holy Spirit can overrule this and produce joy.
• In the home, the buck stops with the husband, with the father.
  And
  if all is not well, the greatest measure of responsibility for that may
  well be in the hands of the leader, the husband / father. By God's
  design and by
  God's will, clearly expressed in Scripture, the man is the head of the
  household, he is the leader, he is the one responsible for the success
  of the marriage, the success of the family, the well-being of everyone
  involved.
• Where are the strong husbands? Where are the loyal, loving,
  leading husbands and fathers? Where are those men who are the backbone,
  the solid framework of structure on which you can build a marriage and
  build a family and build a society? Men have developed their own
  agendas, their own goals, pursuing their own achievements, living in
  worlds, for the most part, isolated completely from the family, out of
  the house, pursuing personal goals, active in their own world of
  business and passive largely in the home. They are, in their world,
  aggressive, doers, problem solvers, coming up with all kinds of
  innovative and inventive ways to make money, seeking promotion,
  prestige and respect from the strangers in their other world. They are
  driven to achieve. And in the home, for the most part, they appear
  passive, indifferent, and irresponsible. A clear principle then is
  given
  in verse 25 - the husband's responsibility is to love his wife. It
  doesn't say rule her, he already has that tendency, even a tendency to
  dominate her, to control her, to command her. The curse does that. He
  is told here that he is to love her. It is the leadership of care. He
  is the stronger vessel, as Peter
  says. It is his responsibility to give direction and provision and
  leadership. But it is in a context of love...always in a context of
  love.
• Successful marriages require teamwork: In days of old on the farm
  the best field work was done with a team of horses that were equally
  matched. With both horses pulling together and equally sharing the
  weight of the load, the plow made a straight furrow. Marriage takes
  work, but it is good work, it takes 100% effort by both husband and
  wife, 100% of the time. It takes a man who will treat his wife with
  honor, it takes a woman who will respect her husband. Marriage takes
  two people who are able to bite their tongues and develop a
  relationship not based on feelings or attraction, but one based on
  faith and love. Faith in God, love for God and love for one another.